The last character appearing in the first episode of Happy! is also the creepiest one from Season 1. In Saint Nick, we soon meet the season’s big baddie, the Very Bad Santa portrayed by Joseph D. Reitman, a junkie dressed as Santa Claus who kidnaps children for Mr. Blue, who then sends them to rich buyers as sex dolls. In the show, we learn that he was abused as a child, and that his imaginary friend (a green sock) abandoned him in the time of need: from there on, he selects the best children and keeps them for himself, lobotomizing them so that they will never grow up and will remain innocent forever. In the comics, he’s not this sympathetic of a villain, quite the opposite: there’s no sock, no history of abuses, and most definitely no “magical place” to protect innocent kids from the world. He’s a monster, period… and the fact that he’s name Pedo Santa rather than Very Bad Santa makes clear why. Let’s see together.

Not much is known about the so-called Pedo Santa, not even his real name. For several years, he had been living in the streets of New York City as a homeless man, finding shelter in some of the many abandoned warehouses and buildings he could find. He had also some very peculiar tastes, along with some other not so peculiar but quite self-destructive ones: he was a junkie, addicted to pretty much everything he could find, but with a particular love for heroin (and cheap alcohol, that he consumed in huge quantities), and he loved children… and not in the good sense of the term. A pedophilic drug-addict with rotten teeth and a bad breath didn’t have many chances to get close to a kid, of course, so the man found a brilliant (according in his opinion) way to overcome the obstacle: during winter, he dressed up as Santa Claus, finding it much easier to approach the object of his desire without causing suspicion… well, not until it was too late, anyway. By doing this, he also found out another interesting thing: there were people interested in what he did, and in a way, if possible, even sicker than his own. Mr. Blue, the all-powerful lord of New York, knew of him, as he knew of everyone else, and got interested in his case. As the dark web market was going strong, Blue contacted him, and instructed him to kidnap as many children as he could, forbidding him to touch them before Christmas night: only then, he would have been free to do with them and to them anything he liked, provided that he did it in his costume, and in front of cameras, so that his performance would have been streamed to paying customers all over the world. It turned out there was a lot of people ready to spend a small fortune to watch a guy dressed as Santa rape kids on Christmas night… the kind of deal the Pedo Santa couldn’t say no to.

Pedo Santa did as he was instructed, not that it took much convincing, and he managed to abduct a half dozen kids in a couple of weeks, bringing them all to the place he had been told by Mr. Blue, an abandoned building in Smith Street. He kept the kids, boys and girls, all together, tied up with Christmas lights, and left them only to go hunting again; in the meanwhile, Blue paid him in drugs, a perfect deal for him. Day by day, Christmas night was approaching, and he just couldn’t wait to go on air. Finally, as just a few hours remained to the live, Pedo Santa took all the kids he had kidnapped, and wrapped them like they were Christmas presents, putting the under a big Christmas tree that Blue had brought there for the stage. Everything was going smoothly, and Santa even allowed himself a last dose before starting the show… and while he was in the bathroom, preparing the syringe, he noted a small, blue flying horse snooping around. The horse, Happy, was quite surprised that Santa could see him, but the surprise was not mutual: the man had seen many, many things, and his perceptions were so altered because of all the booze and the drugs that a blue flying unicorn didn’t even make it to the top three of the weirdest things he had seen in the week. Of course, he didn’t mind the horse much… but this proved to be a mistake, as soon after the creature was back, and with a bigger, more human friend, some Nick Sax that Blue and his henchman Smoothie had been waiting for. While Sax easily killed Smoothie, though, he was not prepared for Santa’s berserker fury, and was quickly overpowered… until Happy came back with reinforcements, more curious creatures than even Pedo Santa had ever seen all at once. Apparently, he wasn’t fighting a man, he was fighting a whole army… and he wasn’t sure he could win.

The man known as Pedo Santa is the kind of monster kids expect to find under their bed, a bad man with many sick appetites who lives of expedients. Perpetually stoned and living in his own imaginary word, Santa is unexpectedly fast and strong, pretty lethal also for adults, not to mention his usual preys; having destroyed his brain with any kind of drug, then, his perception is altered to the point that he can also see the invisible, such as imaginary friends like Happy. A predator like few others, Pedo Santa is about to have the festivity of his life… which implies being about to ruin the lives of many, many innocent people.

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